Recently I’ve been investigating shame within myself. Emotion is the gravity of memory. It is these strong and often painful emotions that weigh down the space-time fields of our perception, determining what we remember and retain as our life experience. It is these recalled emotional atmospheres that shape us, that consciously and unconsciously define who we are.
For me, shame is probably the dominant feeling that pervades my memories and comes up for me in those critical moments when I am getting close to new and unconscious material. In those scary, emotionally charged moments when I am choosing between judgement and curiosity, it is often the voice of shame blarring, acting as a gate keeper, challenging me, testing me, to see if I can withstand the intensity of its spell.
The choice between judgment and curiosity is not an easy choice. It is not easy because the intensity of that shame- or fear, or belief system, or figure or whatever feeling is there yelling its spew- is so great. And precisely because of this, the courage, and the intensity of the desire that inspires and animates the courage, is so critically important. Because it is when we break through this that it evolves our sense of self and the possibilities available in our own lives as well as all of society and furthers the liberation of the collective psyche.
Here is a video sharing some thoughts on shame while playing in the light and shadow of the powerful Oregon Coast.