It has different permutations. It refracts and underlines many other points of tension, dissatisfaction and conflict. But if you go real deep- it is usually the same fight over and over.
And here’s my take: I think what we are fighting for, at a depth level, is for the relationship to support our spiritual path. We can be looking to actualize part of our spiritual path through the relationship, or we can be looking for the relationship to support us to actualize our spiritual path in a broader context. In either case, getting to this deep level of understanding helps us see honestly whether our path is in natural resonance with the other person’s and cut through some of the back and forth that can come to characterize and damage our relationships.